Proper Apology...try it, you'll like it!

So not too long ago, I was taught the proper way to make an apology.  What I realized is most people and when I say most, I'd say at least 75% don't know the proper way to make an apology.

Have you heard this..."I'm sorry?"  or "I won't do that again."

Let me ask you this, when you make an apology, who is the apology about??  You?  the other person?  or both?

Fact:  When you say "I'm sorry."  its 100% about YOU!!  How does simply stating "I'm sorry" really help the other person??  

Fact:  When you say "I won't do that again." its 98% about YOU!!  You have hurt someone here and need to make an apology so what, you expect that by simply stating "I won't do it again" will somehow repair all.  NOT!!

Fact:  When you ask "How can I can I make it up to you?"  you are actually involving the other party in the matter in how they see you can build trust or repair the damage.

Let's try this on for size...

I apologize for __________  (nothing good ever comes from "being" sorry).  In this kind of apology, you actually acknowledge what it is you did wrong.

Now try saying, "What can I do to make it up to you?"  and be willing to do whatever is said.  I mean, when the other person says, "kiss my feet!"  You better be willing to get down and kiss some feet!!

Here is the point:

Somewhere, somehow we have gotten on this bandwagon that says, oh, just say your sorry and that will take care of everything NOT!! it only takes care of you!!  How SELFISH!!

Care about the people you care about and make a formal apology EACH and EVERY single time you need to make amends!

Who do you need to make an apology to?  Even if you've already said "sorry?"